I went to see my brother today. I knocked on the door, I rang him on the house phone and the mobile but he didn't answer. I left him a text and went away. His car was outside but he'd told me he had a friend going to see him today and I thought maybe they'd popped out somewhere together. I kept calling and texting but got worried when I had no reply so I called my older brother. He went straight around and broke in to find him hanging from the door frame. He'd been there while I was knocking the door earlier.
I'm shocked and stunned. I knew he wanted to do it but I thought he was coming around a little. I took him to buy a new car on New Years Day, he seemed ok then. I persuaded him to order a curry because I knew he wasn't eating properly. He sent me a text later to say he'd enjoyed his curry but he still missed mum.
I do feel like I've failed him, but I did try to be there. If only I'd called him this morning, but I didn't bother because I knew I was going around in the afternoon.
I dont' know how much more I can take.
3 comments:
Oh Dear God Anne, I am so very sorry to read this.
Your brother was a troubled soul and you must not blame yourself in any way; when a person is so determined they will find a way. May he rest in peace with your dear mum.
Sending you love, hugs and prayers to get you through your mum's funeral and the coming days and weeks.
Liz xx
Anne ~ I am lost for words, truly. If you ever need to talk then I've sent you my mobile number on fb via pm.
I am in tears for you and for the great loss you have suffered.
My lovely, too much for one girl to cope with, just too much.
Gentle hugs and lots and lots of love winging it's way to you.
Sharon xx
{{Anne}}
I can only echo what Liz said and send you all my love at this sad time.
xxxx
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