More Grave Stuff

I honestly don't know what to think about all this now, as if grief isn't bad enough. I posted in July about the saga of my aunt and her fabric flowers back in July, well, it's happened again only this time she claimed the pot was taken as well as the flowers. So she and her sister (Another of my aunts, of course) have bought another pot and refilled it, and they have built a fence around nan's part of the grave (She has a stone in the middle where her casket of ashes was buried). I went to see and it looks ridiculous. I can just imagine what mum would say, and nan for that matter. I had a little chat with them while I was there. (oh and while I was there I found the 'missing' flower pot???) My aunt is now insisting that someone does not want nan to be buried with my mum and is sabotaging her part of the grave purpously. Absolutely bloody ridiculous. There is no-one at all that would object to nan being there, everyone who loved mum loved nan too. So my aunt has already started the ball rolling on getting nan out of there. I'm really at a loss as what to do. I don't want nan removed purely because I know, as in I talked about it with nan and mum before they died, that being there together was what they both wanted. My mum would be utterly heartbroken if she could see what was going on.

I have a theory or two of my own. I know my auntie was jealous of mum's relationship with their mum (nan), my mum was the oldest, my aunt the youngest and between the two of them they were the closest to nan out of all her eight children. There was always a lot of jealousy while everyone was alive which often caused fallings out. Especially when they would all go on holiday together. When nan died the family drifted apart and when we had our troubles within our family (i.e. me, mum and my brothers) it was a perfect excuse for the rest of the family to take sides and this particularly auntie was one who sided against her. I'm thinking that now she is planning some revenge on mum by having nan taken away from her. It sounds crazy I know, but I think I know my family well enough to know how they work.

However, if that is not her reason, or maybe her main reason or one that she would ever admit to, the other theory is that she knows (I don't know how) that my younger brother's ashes were buried there too and she must be mad as hell that nan is buried with him. The truth is nan adored my younger brother, and he adored her, I know in my heart that nan would be happy with the set up, it's just the rest of the family who can't accept it.

So here I am, now over 8 months since losing them and I'm feeling just as depressed as ever. What ever happened to rest in peace? Why can't they just leave them alone? What can I do? I really need to go and speak to my aunt face to face, but I will have to be honest with her and I know she's not going to like it, and up until all of this she was my favourite auntie from when I was little, and she was someone I could turn to when I wasn't talking to mum. I feel just as bad by opposing her, but I don't think I can rest until I've said my piece.