Back to School and stuff

Today was the girls first day back at school after the long summer holiday. Last night Lucy was really stressed out, crying and begging us not to take her. This morning she was fine and excited about going back!!  (the only blip was when her dad told her that her best friend wouldn't be there, we had a few more tears then :-(
They went to school fine. The school wasn't really prepared though. First the gates were locked and we had to walk around the block to the other side of the school. Then they couldn't open the doors and the children were all waiting to get in while the teacher were rushing around inside like headless chickens looking for the keys. They got in eventually and when we went to pick them up they were all smiles saying they had had a good day. Lucy likes her new teacher, fortunately she's already really familiar with her as she is the school's SENCO (special education needs co-ordinator) Leila also likes her new teacher. I do worry about Leila, sometimes more than Lucy, as she seems locked in a completely different world to anyone else, she is a happy little girl though (mostly)

It was a bit of a surprise having their dad get up to go to school with them. That probably won't happen to often as he doesn't like getting up in the morning. After the school run I came back to do a little housework and then we went out. We did a little shopping and then I took some flowers down to the grave. It's the first time I've been to visit since I saw it stripped  off last time, it's still a bit of a shock. Fresh flowers always make a grave look nicer though. Near the gates is the plaque for my step-dad. I used to leave him flowers but they are so expensive it's difficult enough to afford to make our grave look good and there are never any to spare. Today I felt really guilty because tomorrow it's the 33rd anniversary of my step-dad Desmond's death. I remember it so well, it was the day I'd gone back to school, 2nd yr senior, and he'd been building a patio in our garden. On the night I was woken up by my mum screaming for me. I went into the bedroom and saw instantly that my step-dad was dead. Mum was telling me to get an ambulance. The ambulance came but as I already knew, there was nothing they could do. That night comes back to haunt me frequently. I will take flowers for him next time, or maybe a little plant. He was a lovely man and made my mum very happy for the few years they had together. (caused a bit of a stir at the time too, my nan fell out with my mum because she started dating Desmond just a year after my dad died)

I digress! The rest of my day followed with lunch in a cafe that Graham and I used to visit a lot from when I was expecting Lucy until I had Leila. We would go there every Saturday for lunch. It felt strange going there with Joseph today. After lunch we did a little shopping. I visited one shop that was in the old Jobcentre, that was a little strange.

When we got home I kind of slumped a little. I'm feeling much better now, but sometimes my head thinks too much! I have so much crap going around in there I don't know what I'm thinking sometimes.