Night out!

When I worked at the uni I made two lovely friends and we have stayed in touch ever since, even though I left the job 11 years ago. We always meet up at Christmas, birthdays and often try a summer date too (seeing as we were all born in winter!)
Last night it was a birthday celebration in a local(ish) pub. Now, it's been a long time since I got drunk and I wasn't really planning on getting drunk last night. It's not fun feeling drunk or hungover when you've got 3 little ones who often need mummy during the night. But we were having such a good night with lots of laughs and had moved onto these funny little drinks called bombs, which as the name suggests  were potent. We were drinking Glitter Bombs a mixture of goldschlager and redbull, you get a shot glass floating in a glass and drink them both together. I don't even like red bull!!
Around 9pm my friend looked at her watch and told us the time saying 'oh, we are now about to enter the Twilight Zone' followed by a little Twilight Zone music. (Of course if you are younger than 35 you probably think this has something to do with Vampires and Werewolves, but actually it doesn't) We established that this actually meant that the next time one of us looked at the time it would seem like only 5 minutes had past but it would be ten to 11. 5 minutes later I was at the bar with my friend and I looked at the clock....10.50pm yep, the Twilight Zone had got us again.
When I got home I was feeling quite alien, but very happy. I did what you should never ever do when drunk and updated my facebook status, I wrote 'drinkiong gold asnsdv qwerll pisaghedf musyt gop to bed so weird twoligfhtv zxonmer'
translated into English, 'drinking gold and feeling well pissed must go to bed so weird twilight zone ' punctuation goes out the window when drunk!
The kids were fantastic throughout the night. Joseph woke twice but went straight back to sleep. Lucy got me up at 5.30am and I had an headache, but nothing a couple of paracetomal couldn't clear :-)

The Story of a Council House repair

I've lived in my council house for more than 22 years now and I have many stories to tell. My partner gets annoyed with me when I don't report minor repairs or take ages to report them, but I'm honestly sick of the whole process and will deliberately delay it as long as possible.
Here is my latest story and it begins 5 years ago when we had our radiators installed. They put one in our loo and I informed them that the wall wasn't very strong as Craige had put a hole in it and I'd filled it with PolyFilla. I said there was no way it would hold a radiator, but what did I know? The radiator was fitted on the faulty wall. Cut to 4 years later when the radiator first fell off the wall, I'm really surprised it lasted so long but knew it was inevitable. They sent out a man who said "that radiator should not have been put there, the wall isn't strong enough" No, really! So unable to re fix the radiator he left saying he'd send out a plasterer. The plasterer arrived and said, I can't remove the radiator to fix the wall I'm not qualified, I'll call the gas people to remove it. I gave up when no-one turned up and propped the radiator up (still partially attached) and waited until it was really necessary to have it fixed.
So a few weeks ago the radiator started leaking. *sigh* I called the repair service. The man came. "I can't see where the leak is coming from" he said. That's because it was coming from a pipe that was covered with trunking which he made no attempt to remove. "You need to get the radiator fixed back on the wall then it will stop leaking. I haven't got the right tools, I'll get someone else to do it"
Two weeks later I get a letter saying they had been trying to contact me but had no luck by telephone. Very strange, I'd had no calls on home phone or mobile and no messages. So I call the number they gave me in the letter repeatedly over the next three days and it's constantly engaged.
Then a guy turns up at the door. "I've come to fix your radiator" whoopee I cried and did a little dance (not really, I'm joking!)
Taking a look, notice I say look, he didn't actually touch the radiator, he said "I can't fix that, I don't have the right tools" oh really! "You'll need that wall plastered properly before I can do anything, I'll get a plasterer to come out" deja vu. He turned to leave....oh no you don't, I blocked his way out of the loo, "would it not be a good idea to remove the radiator so that when the plasterer comes he can actually get to the wall to plaster it?" mmmm, yes, ok. And radiator was removed. He left me with the knowledge that they only had one plasterer and he only worked on Thursdays. As it was Thursday it was going to be at least a week before he could come. Oh Joy!
This morning I wake up to a flood in the loo. So I call the repairs team and they will be sending someone out today!

Respect my Authoritah!!!

In church today I had to restrain myself from a fit of the giggles. Our minister is Nigerian and has a thick accent. Today he was talking about figures of authority, so obviously he kept saying the word authority, only he was saying authoritah just like Cartman in South Park!!

Ever had one of 'those' days?

my entire life is one of those days. Well it feels like it and I'm sick of it. I'm fed up of the moaning, complaining, arguing, the way everything is always my fault, I have to do everything for everyone and still it's not enough. It's my fault if anything goes wrong, it's my fault if appointments aren't made, or kept, it's my fault the kids are playing up, it's my fault the baby is crying, it's my fault when something breaks. It's my fault I'm fucking breathing!

OH how I wish I could get away, just me and the little ones. I would take them far away from here so we could get on with on lives and live the way I want us to. I wouldn't have to put up with the complaining or the lying. I wouldn't have to feel like I was trapped in a never ending spiral. Nothing ever gets better here, no matter how hard I try. I try to be understanding, I try to keep the peace, I put up with all sorts of shit, I keep my tongue well and firmly bitten almost all of the time. There are four adults in this house and three of them are driving this one fucking crazy.

I dont' want to tread on egg shells anymore. I don't want to live a lie. I want to be free. And if I can't be free then I'd rather be dead.

Sod the lot of them!
Rant over!

Do I Say I Do?

I was watching The Wright Stuff the other morning and they were asking if you would/did marry to please your father. Well, I did even though my dad had been dead for 12 years by the time I wed. I even got married in the church where he was buried so he could be there. He was very old fashioned and I just know that had he been alive he would have wanted me to marry before living with my partner and having children. So I got married at 20 and it lasted 19 years but only because it took me 9 years to get a divorce.

Now I'm being asked to get married again. I didn't really want to marry again but he thinks it's because I don't love him enough. So I've agreed to a quiet registry office wedding. It won't happen though unless I arrange it. The old fashioned me wants to be married to my little one's dad and have the same name, it seems the right thing to do and I can't imagine ever being with anyone else. A part of me knows I could do a lot worse, but I could also do a lot better, but I wouldn't bother trying for the better so why not settle for what I have. I can't trust him but then that makes no difference wether we are married or not, I don't think he will change just because he is my husband. So here I am trying to decide wether to actually go for it or not. Which seems sad, because it shouldn't be like this. I know I will make the right decision in the end.

Having trouble........

.....finding things to be cheerful and upbeat about!

Let's face it, if I did keep this blog just for writing about the good things that happen, well, I don't think I'd make a post a month!
Sorry, today has been stressful. I've been ok, but everyone around me has had a meltdown at some point today and I've been stuck right in the middle. *sigh*


Why do people lie? I feel like I've spent all my life around people who can lie without even flinching. I used to lie too, I thought it was normal, but since I've thought about it more I try to be as truthful as possible at all times. Of course there are times when it is necessary to lie, and sometimes when you think lying is the right thing to do (even though it might not be) and it's often said that lies come back to haunt you. But why lie when it's completely unnecessary? Why lie just for the sake of it? Why lie, when you know the truth is bound to come out sooner rather than later?

Someone lied to me last week knowing that I would see the person that they lied about this week and find out the truth. Why? I just don't get it. I guess they are just a compulsive liar and can't help themselves.

 “I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible.”
― J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

How do I deal with someone like this? How can I ever believe a word they say?

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you.”
― Friedrich Nietzsche

Fat Busting!

Ok, I know I've been here before with the whole I need to lose weight gripe. Well, I've never been totally unhappy with my figure, I like being a little curvy and don't miss my skinny days (old nickname 'beanpole') But it's time to face facts, I'm getting fatter! I lost all my baby weight and was doing well, but then I got complacent, and then I got greedy and now I'm putting it all back on. No more, I say. Today I've started to work on shifting it. I will reach my goal weight and stay there. So put those biscuits away, keep the chocolate for the kids, and baking is for Sunday's only (and then I'll only try a little) I'm going to be slim for the summer!